Balancing it all, it’s something we struggle with everyday.

Or maybe it’s just me – sometimes it certainly feels like it’s just me, like I’m the only one who hasn’t figured myself out, the only one who hasn’t found my rhythm, flopping around like a fish out of water, sightless and aimless and waiting for someone to have mercy on me and throw me back where I belong.

But that can’t be true can it? In my clearer moments I can see the people around me sometimes just as lost but also equally driven. I think the reality is that my friends and my rivals and all my loved ones – we all struggle with it on the daily.

But it’s such a topic – how to admit we need help while still being a feminist and a girl boss and a mom, or in my case a dog mom. We should be able to do it all…. right? Juggle the Mom Life, the Self Care, Home Maintenance, Social Life, Personal Life, getting enough sleep and Still be the perfect Girl Boss that inspires our peers and all the young girls looking to us to see who they should aspire to be.

As a Girl with big dreams, I look to Classic Characters like Monica Geller (Friends), Carrie Bradshaw (Sex In The City), Cristina Yang (GREY’s Anatomy) and even newer characters like Olivia Pope (Scandal), Jacqueline Carlyle (The Bold Type), and Kelsey Peters (Younger) to show me the ideal lifestyle of the Empowered Woman that I strive for everyday. The type of woman who has this amazing life, somehow makes time for everything and still has this amazing career or at least is working towards it.

My reality though is nothing like a TV show – my reality is that trying to balance everything is a mission and a half. There’s just so many things to do, and how am I ever supposed to find a way to do them all and not run myself ragged?

A few years ago I felt like “That Life” of:

• 5am Work Outs
• Outdoor Doggy Potty Trips
• Doggy Breakfast
• Human Breakfast
• Pre-Work Girlfriend Coffee Meets
• Work
• Girlfriend Lunch Outings
• More Work
• Post-Work Happy Hour
• Doggy Dinner
• Human Dinner
• Another Outdoor Doggy Potty Trip
• House Chores
• Self Care Hour
• Healthy Romantic Relationship Interactions
• Shower and Bedtime Rituals
• Lather Rinse Repeat

Was not ever gonna be my life. I mean – look at that list. I was barely managing feeding my dogs, waking up 5 minutes before I had to leave for work and sometimes taking care of my house on my Days off.

But then Today I woke up at 5 am and worked out. I fed my dogs, myself and my sister, took the pups out for potty, worked on my blog, talked to my girlfriends, got ready for my day, worked on my Jacky Moon Designs, did some Social Media Managing, Did lunch, talked to my Girls again, Grocery Shopped, Made dinner, Fed the Pups their meal-prepped food, talked to my parents, watched a little TV and went to bed on time so I can do it all over again tomorrow.

I feel like that’s okay, I did as much as I could, and each day I try and do more. It’s hard and I’m so tired –  why did none of the characters in those shows look like they felt as tired as I do. I am by no means a morning person, never have been, being up before 11 is a freakin’ miracle and its all new to me. Just last week my schedule was never awake before 10. I never got enough Work done, my dogs were dying to have all my attention and my sleep pattern was nonexistent.

So what changed? What made it so that Today could be a real day in my life that actually looks like other real days in my life that have actually taken place for real? Well a few weeks ago I had a long talk with my Fam, and together we Started to form a plan on how to fix things in my life to obtain some sense of balance.

Through their observations we realized I am less stressed and get more done with a proper sleep, eat and workout schedule. Which I haven’t really had since I started college. So we Started there, I came up with a Bedtime that I felt I could be okay with. I know, right: 26 with a bedtime, who am I? But it all starts the night before, a good night’s rest can change everything.

Now don’t get me wrong, going to sleep earlier was a hard adjustment and sometimes I couldn’t do it. Years of being a night owl trained me against it. But the important part is each day I tried again until I got it. Next thing I knew, in the matter of a Week I slowly trained myself to wake up a little earlier everyday until I got to my desired wake up time.

Which, sidebar but I think that part is different for all of us right ? It depends on our life, the amount of things we need to get done in a day and what our responsibilities and schedules will allow – everyone’s life is different and we should all find what works best for ourselves. My wake-up time and bedtime are what they are because they allow me to fit all of my daily responsibilities in and to still get a good amount of sleep every night.

And then since the most Important part of all of this is consistency, Once I Picked the time, “I stuck to the Plan” as Keith says (My Survivor Fans will get that one 😉 ).

Next was food. This part was daunting for me seeing that I’ve never had a good relationship with food. I have always either ate too much or not enough food and always the wrong foods. As a Mexican, cooking everything in Oil with lots of seasonings and even sometimes with “lard” (yuck) was just the way things were done. I have always been picky, The pain in my mother’s bottom growing up ‘cause I wouldn’t eat my food. As a daughter of two Teenage middle class struggling parents, Veggies were not a thing in my house. This was partly because they were too expensive and partly because my fam wasn’t well educated in Nutrition, an unfortunate but common case for a lot of families out there passed down from generation to generation. Knowing how to cook has not been a problem since I was 10. No, the Problem was nutrition knowledge.

So as any good millennial would, I took to Youtube.

I am in No way an Expert but I found videos of people who were and I educated myself. I found things all the videos had in common and came up with new meal plans that worked for me. This part I did mostly cold turkey. I cut out everything that I knew would not Bring me Joy, as Marie Kando would say, and I kept everything that would be good for me.

At This Point I was getting the right amount of sleep and learning to cut off my work and personal life if need be to get to bed on time. I had been waking up early enough to feel like I was making progress but I was still feeling a little stress and anxiety. I was wondering if this would really work because nothing I tried before had. So I had to find my inner strength and I listened to my Grams Words in my head: “Just Do It” (Nike who??? No no, My grams!).

So I pushed myself further and added working out every morning to my schedule. It was so good for my stress and anxiety – it cleared my mind and helped me start each day. Things were coming along just as planned. Then I got on the phone with my Dad and he helped me break down everything I Need and Want to get done on a daily and weekly Basis, Writing down the everyday things In one column and the weekly things In the Other. With everything written out like that it was easier to see how things would come together.

From There I was able to make my To-Do List for each day. On top of working out and eating right, I was sure to include Self Care, Work, DogMom stuff, my Home maintenance tasks and time to socialize, ‘Cause we gotta make time to take care of ourselves, right? And Spending time with our friends and fam is so important. It helps keep us motivated and on track with “the plan”. My pups are my everything, as I’m sure you dog moms and dads can relate to, so of course that was a must. The Mexican im me knows if my grams knew I had my house a mess there would be an endless lecture and a lot of curse words. Clean clothes, clean rooms, clean dogs, and a clean house all lead to good vibes for a neat freak like myself, I gotta say I do get it from my grams. And as for the last item on my daily list, well, everyones got bills to pay, am I right? So work has to be fit in. I know we all want that stay at home dog mom life, But whatever pays the bills.

After this it is all about “sticking to the plan”. And “The Plan” is:

• Abide by my sleep schedule
• Take it One step at a time
• Re-work Daily/Weekly tasks on regular basis
• Take breaks when needed

And most importantly:

• No Giving Up

I made this plan and I can amend it if something isn’t working but the fact is that within two weeks I proved to myself that I am capable of creating balance and consistency in my life. The kind I never knew I could have. I am trying so hard every day – that has to count for something, right?

Maybe this whole Girl Boss Dog Mom Self Empowering life can be my life. Maybe I can do it all…..

Talk soon

-Jean Marie

P.S.: I will keep y’all updated on how “the plan” is working out and any amendments I had to make as it happens. I left a few .PDFs to help you make your perfect plan that creates balance in your life and help you achieve your goals. There is also a sample of mine so you can see the choices I made in creating  my schedule. Whether you are a girl boss, a parent, or a dog parent, balance can help you live your best life. Share in the comments if these tips were helpful and if there are any tips or tricks y’all have to help you “do it all” in your life.

Downloadable PDfs 

 I Can Do It All Jean Marie

 You Can Do It All Priorities

 You Can Do It all Plan